Communion

My spirit gleams with inner light,

revealing depths beyond all might. 

Its vastness flows without a bound, 

where precious wisdom can be found.

Strength glows pure, 

my essence free.

Having eloped with pure infinity,

my heart beats in dignity,

for it has bypassed time and married infinity.

Emotion- a call to pay attention

What is this force that stirs within,

an unseen tide beneath my skin?

It shifts, it sways and sometimes makes a sound;

it even moves my world and turns me around.

A mystery deep. I cannot see,

what triggers its next dance in me.

It overwhelms and it takes control

by flooding my body and gripping my soul.

Emotion—energy in motion’s name,

a force untamed, a blazing flame.

God, how I wish to hold it tight,

to guide its path and to dim its light.

Yet, though it storms and shakes my core,

I know its worth which I can't ignore.

For in its surge, it speaks to me,

revealing truths I cannot flee.

It binds me to my humanness,

a map to pain, to joy and to stress.

It marks the road where I have been

and points the way to dreams unseen.

So while I wrestle and while I plead,

I know this force is what I need.

For life’s great journey, fierce and true,

depends on what this motion cues.

Inside Out: A Poem

 

Inside Out

You feel the weight. The shadow’s press.
The world, unmoving, feeds your distress.
It does not shift, it does not care
and leaves you stranded, gasping for air.

A victim's lens, so clouded and dim,
draws all light inward and keeps it grim.
Yet pause, turn and refocus sight,
what if your gift could cast new light?

Two forms of one, a tale unfolds;
truth by carbon the parent told.
The diamond shines, its facets gleam,
a beacon bright, a dreamer’s dream.

Its brilliance comes from inner grace,
a self-lit fire and a boundless space.
Yet charcoal craves the light outside,
and in that longing, dims its pride.

What is life if not to share,
knowledge, joy, and love laid bare?
Carbon whispers of a light within your soul,
Its radiant flow can heal and make you whole.

Be not the charcoal, seeking more,
a bottomless pit or a closing door.
Instead, be diamond, radiant, and true,
the light within will guide you through.

Let not the world act upon you,
but you act instead, be bold, and break through.
From inside out, a light wave streams,
building others and fulfilling dreams.

Be the actor, take the stage
and turn the sorrow into sage.
For when you give, you truly see,
the boundless self you’re meant to be.

Discipline as living an authentic life.

We are taught during our childhood that discipline is from the outside in. However, this is just bulldozing. 

Rather than discipline, traditionally, a much healthier option is discipline as self-care.  

It is important for a person to have a vision and a reason to do something that resonates with themselves. Rather than feeling like a diamond being worked upon, they need to feel worked with and in the interest of. 

If this approach of discipline is taken during childhood, children would learn what authenticity is and they would create lives that are authentic to themselves hence they would likely be successful in their own eyes. 

'Success' is very personal and subjective as each one has a different vision of success for ourselves. 

What could be a greater failure than achieving success in the eyes of the world, only to feel like a failure within yourself? The pain comes from knowing that a shift is needed, but not being understood by others. The true pain lies in the realization of the immense courage and self-faith required to make that change.

Yet, there’s even more courage needed when the world sees you as a failure, and you must change course to live authentically. In such a case, the world doubts your ability or credibility.

Regardless of how the world sees you, one thing is certain: we all must die someday. So, why not live in a way that aligns with what you truly want to do?

Being true to oneself requires one to not give a fuck about what the world thinks but care about what you think and feel and actually backing up your vision, intuition and dream with courage, action and faith. 

Imagine the kind of uncertainty J.K. Rowling must have gone through when she first started and then continued working on Harry Potter. 

However, it is also important to not be a stand-alone island in this world but foster the process of osmosis and thus allow yourself the resource of perspective hence ensuring that you are not just inspiring, authentic and unique but also relevant and rich in your work. 

Why one has a major injury.

                                 

When one has a major injury, the news spreads soon among all relatives and family friends. Then, everyone contemplates and gossips about why one had that injury.  

They vocalize their thoughts to each other and it may even reach the injured person. 

Some say it is because of bad karma and some say it is because God wanted the injured person to not go in the direction they were going and some say that God wanted to punish them. 

Louise Hay who wrote a book on somatic causes of physical ailments titled 'Heal your body' says that accidents happen because of the feeling of rebellion against authority. 

In my opinion, even if there might be some truth or a lot of truth in what is said, the whole truth is known only to the injured person. 

The injured person needs to think and introspect about why the injury happened. The dots can be connected backwards. What was the person thinking about most of the time before the injury? What are they feeling most of the time? What did they pray to God for earnestly before the injury? 

We can make sense of the injury in the future too. But only from the present can we go into the future. The injured person then needs to take the opportunity of the present to not only work on their body but also their mind.  They need to not only reflect on what aspects of themselves they need to shed like old snake skin but actually shed them. The shedding is a very courageous thing to do.  The old safe crutches which are no more needed need to be given up for the sake of freedom and a life that is living and not dead. I say dead because a life in which ways of the past that are no more relevant in the present is then irrelevant to the present and thus is stuck in the past. Sometimes life gives a physical break to do a ton of mental and emotional work.  

Shedding self-sabotaging beliefs, attitudes, compulsions and habits needs self-awareness. For self awareness one needs to be present in each moment of the day.  Although it's not common, it is doable and a tendency that can be cultivated. 

Only from a place of self-awareness can one transform. We often have our eyes on the peak of the mountain but we don't remove the stone in our shoes. 

I have noticed that even though there may be problems in our lives, the real demons are internal. The problems are problems because we are not able to solve them.  So instead of working on problems, we need to work on ourselves and the truth is only we have access to the whole picture of our reality and this is a better perspective than anyone else's unless it gets covered up by Ego or ignorance. 

Presence is light and light lets us see the truth. 

How I'm healing my knee injury.

Dec. 6, 2024.

1. Warm milk with tumeric and pepper powder. 

2. Tea made of neem, tulsi, tumeric, pepper powder, lemon and ginger. 

3. Laddoos made of dink (boswellia). 

4. Daily soaking in sunlight. 

5. Sleeping early (between 9 pm to 10 pm). 

6. Basic physical therapy. 

7. Yogasanas, pranayam and meditation. 

8. Namsmaran and mantras.  

9. Regularly having quality  conversations with family members.  

10. Observing nature. 

11. Using a knee brace. 

12. Icing. 

13. Using a walker.

A dead person's essence.

A persons essence is not retained in his belongings. 

He carries his essence with him to the next body with his soul. 

His essence is retained through his vision, values and legacy. 

These are scalable and imperishable. 

This is the difference between Hinayana (lesser wheel) and Mahayana (greater wheel) Buddhism. 

Buddha never called himself God. He did not teach idol worship. Buddhism was like that for many years after Buddha's death.  His principles were lived by.  

When Mahayana Buddhism came, idol worship began. 

This is why all religions start with purity but they get distorted with wrong interpretations and ritualism. 

By being symbolic and protecting the symbols, we are loosing the real thing (essence). 

The symbols are secondary and the real thing is primary. Ram's fame was alive even when there was no Ram temple at Ayodhya.

Do the inner work.

They don't know who you are.  

They may throw stones or paint your face black.  

They may put you on a pedestal or pray to you or clap for you or salute you.  

They may agree to everything you say. 

They may reject everything you say. 

They may ignore you. 

They will never know who you are.  

The ones who know you make you feel seen and safe always, irrespective of the circumstance. 

Always keep in mind who you are.  

Always keep in your mind your vision because only you can see it.  

Your reputation preceeds you when you enter a room but they don't know who you are.  

Believe in yourself and believe in your vision.  

They don't know these things. 

In praise and criticism keep your calm. 

Yourself and your vision are the only reality that exists for you.  Because just as they don't know you, you don't know them.  

What happens outside should not matter.  

What happens inside should matter because what happens on the inside eventually impacts the outside.  

Go out of your mind

Go to the window. 

Open it. 

You will know why you are alive. 

The whole earth is just a creation for you. 

You are a creation of you. Everything is created because you experience it. 

Be real. 

Get out of your mind. 

Nothing is there. 

It’s just a place that keeps you stuck. 

Go to the window. 

Open it. 

Life is not short. Life is uncertain. Life is or is not.

Let the storm pass. 

You will see the bottom of the lake. 

Make the tortoise your friend. 

It is not a sea shell for you to break open, extract your pearl and throw away. 

It's hard exterior is there for a reason. 

It was an evolution to protect it from an unsafe environment. 

Pull back on the threats. 

It has realized that the ultimate power is self-dependence and not other-dependence. 

It is not a fool to trust, given your dirty track record.

It may not be able to go anywhere right now but at least it is alive. 

The world might think that it is too slow to progress as they compare it with the fast or the tall and settled ones. 

However, by staying safe, it can have the life it came to have. 

All experiences and growth are not necessarily exterior. 

Because it has life, it has hope. Hope is its first fundamental right and power. 

It knows the secret of divinity. 

Hence, it lives long and holds on to hope because it protects its only belonging- 'life' with all of its dear life itself. 

Another facet of divinity it benefits from is 'faith'. With this mighty faith, it travels long distances between continents without any effort because it flows inside the oceanic currents. This faith beats the faith of any fast or tall effort-taking personality. There is no comparison. Do you remember this-"Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done, On earth as it is in heaven"? 

It does not do much because it is wise. It is a participant in a race bigger than marathons. It is not even a race of life but an education throughout all lives. It stays the course by never giving up. 

Authoritarianism towards children is comparable to the colonialism.

The capitalistic man was birthed by the invention of agriculture. He not only subjugated nature but also women and children. 'Value' which is actually subjective, started becoming more defined by him and imposed on the society. As tribes got converted to families, women and land began to be owned. Only that which could be used as a means of exchange and thus, quantified could be seen as valuable. Certain forms of humans were less valuable and thus, some humans, were less equal. So, the 'myths' or 'agreements' created all over the world, may have brought civilization but also corruption. Corruption because, some things became sacred and some profane, some humans important, others less important and nature was meant to serve man just as the earth was the center of the solar system. This is why Science and spirituality go hand in hand. They are logical and beyond the man-made myths. However, science is always catching up. :D Gossip fueled the myths and fostered groups like countries, religions and castes. This created class consciousness. To get man's rights met, he needs group advocacy for the same. What do children do? By the time most of them realize things, they are adults. 

So, just the way feminists say, 'personal is political', man stayed the same, on a global as well as in the smallest social unit. Below, I show how colonial mentality is quite similar to certain forms of parenting. Because the innocent ones are the easiest victims of a corrupted man. 

Many scholars and theorists have drawn parallels between certain forms of parenting and colonialism, emphasizing how power dynamics and control can suppress individual autonomy and development. Although all these thinkers do not explicitly equate parenting with colonialism, their analyses of power, control, and oppression provide a framework to understand how authoritarian and controlling parenting practices can mirror colonial dynamics. Following are some notable thinkers who have explored these ideas:

1. Paulo Freire

Freire’s concept of the "oppressor-oppressed" relationship in education can be applied to parenting. He discusses how oppressive structures inhibit growth and autonomy, similar to how authoritative parenting can stifle a child's development and independence. His notable work is titled 'Pedagogy of the Oppressed'.

2. Bell Hooks

Her key work  'All About Love: New Visions', Bell discusses how authoritarian parenting mirrors broader societal structures of domination and control. She emphasizes the need for love and nurturing in parenting rather than control and suppression. 

3. Alice Miller

Miller in his works like  'For Your Own Good: Hidden Cruelty in Child-Rearing and the Roots of Violence' critiques traditional authoritarian parenting practices, comparing them to oppressive systems. She argues that such practices can have long-term detrimental effects on children, similar to the impacts of colonial oppression. 

4. Frantz Fanon

Although Fanon primarily focuses on the psychology of colonization, his ideas about the internalization of oppression can be extended to family dynamics. Authoritarian parenting can be seen as a microcosm of colonial dynamics, where parental control suppresses a child’s identity and autonomy.

5. Michel Foucault

Foucault’s analysis of power, surveillance, and discipline in society can be applied to parenting. The family can be seen as a site of power dynamics where children are disciplined and controlled in ways that echo broader societal mechanisms of control and domination. 'Discipline and Punish: The Birth of the Prison' is one of his literray contributions. 

6. Adrienne Rich

In 'Of Woman Born: Motherhood as Experience and Institution', Rich explores the institution of motherhood and how societal expectations impose oppressive structures on women. Her analysis can be extended to understand how these structures impact children within the family, particularly in terms of control and lack of autonomy.

7. Gloria Anzaldúa

Anzaldúa’s exploration of identity, oppression, and cultural expectations can be related to parenting. She discusses how cultural and familial expectations can be oppressive, limiting individual autonomy and personal growth.

The works of these thinkers encourage a more nurturing, respectful, and autonomy-promoting approach to relationships, whether in education, family, or society at large. Change needs to happen at all levels.  Unless man changes, victims will continue to stay victims of victims and the cycle shall never end. 

Making walking a daily practice for all.

Each morning, I embark on a 20-minute walk, and the benefits I've experienced from this routine have exceeded my expectations. Just in the first 3 days of doing this daily practice, I felt stronger and lighter. It makes me have immense respect and regard for the magnificent human body. It doesn’t ask for much. Thanks to Mr. Darren Hardy for the book titled, ‘The Compound Effect’, I have realized that small daily habits not only create better results in your life but also create a long-lasting transformation in you.

Walking for 15 to 30 minutes is a habit that can be easily adopted in our daily lives. Walking in the morning is wise because the morning sun improves cognitive performance and focus. Sunlight exposure triggers the release of serotonin, known as the happiness hormone, enhances bone health, and potentially aids in the treatment of various skin conditions.

Spending time in nature can reduce stress and anxiety by lowering cortisol levels and enhancing mood. Regular walks outdoors can also improve cardiovascular health by lowering blood pressure. Additionally, being in nature enhances creativity, focus, and cognitive function and also boosts the immune system. Overall, it's linked to improved self-esteem and well-being.

To promote walking in nature for everyone, public health policies can prioritize creating accessible green spaces within urban areas, ensuring that parks and trails are well-maintained and easily reachable by public transportation or walking paths. Government initiatives can include implementing flexible work schedules or policies that allow for breaks during the day to spend time outdoors, promoting walking meetings, or providing incentives for employers to encourage outdoor breaks.

Labor policies could be adapted to include provisions for mandatory breaks or flexible working hours that accommodate outdoor activities. For instance, countries like Singapore have implemented green space initiatives such as the "Park Connector Network," which links parks and natural areas with walking and cycling paths, making it easier for residents to incorporate outdoor activities into their daily routines. Changes to the built environment can involve urban planning that prioritizes green spaces, pedestrian-friendly infrastructure, and mixed-use developments that integrate nature into the urban landscape.

Moreover, interventions to improve the public transport system would automatically increase walking as it would reduce the number of privately owned vehicles. Overall, collaboration between government agencies, urban planners, employers, and community stakeholders is essential to create environments that encourage and facilitate walking in nature for all individuals.

An Introduction to Feminism

Why are some people incapable of accepting gender equality at work but not inside the home? 

Why do some people see gender equality only as economic parity? 

Why don’t they see the need for positive discrimination for women? 

The answer is, they don’t know what they are doing. What we can do best is to accept it and forgive. However, we should not stop the resistance. 

I understand why feminists are angry. The reason is that basic things are not understood, accepted and appreciated. This is because people just follow what has been happening in every area of life without questioning. Einstein found gravity when he questioned the obvious. 

Somewhere there is a huge chasm between community and society. Community supports but society pressurizes. However, if the force of the bigger of the two is higher (which is the case mostly) then, the community cannot support its individuals. They are too small. 

This is why the feminists said, “Personal is political”. They said it because it is impossible to break though these historical chains without organizing ourselves and fighting for our rights as a group. We cannot focus on only changing the mindset of a few individuals. The change has to be massive for the mindset that has not changed for eons to bend.

Those who aren’t feminists often ask, “why do we need to fight and why are we aggressive”? My response is, that screams reflect the pain. Non- feminists, try to convince the feminists to ignore those aspects of gender discrimination which do not cause any physical harm. To this my response is, a title doesn’t cause any harm, what is in a name, idol worship doesn’t make sense; however, words create reality (Sankalp se Srishti) and that you can’t spit on a god’s idol. Things might not cause harm evidently and crudely, but why let unnecessary practices which harm subtly and which are based on gender based discrimination exist? It is better to follow the constitution rather than blindly follow traditions that are discriminatory and unnecessary. 

Non- feminists either don’t understand feminism or are unempathetic. Not being a feminist is not justifiable in modern day constitutional democracy. This I say to those who want to agree to disagree. They cannot afford to and should not be allowed to either. 

Also, it is necessary to mention that feminism extends to valuing feminine attributes that are in humanity as much as the masculine values. At present the world is quite lopsided. Feminism also means no gender based discrimination against men as well. Feminism is not at all anti-men. It is only about equality, justice and freedom. However, it sure does make non-feminists men and women uncomfortable. 

A Plea to the Indian Public to Detach From Your Identities for the Sake of the Nation.

After observing some festivals in Pune, I wonder if I am staying in a nation or among nations. 
On the occasion of Ambedkar Jayanti (April 14, 2024) since 12 am there were bursting of crackers and music was played all day in a high volume. The roads were congested due to the gathering of many people all day long. 
This made me wonder if India is truly liberated. Ambedkar was a phenomenal and inspirational person because of his commitment to self-development, education, equality, the Constitution and him being a plausible leader in the society. I wondered about why were Bollywood songs played in order to celebrate the Chairman of the Constituent assembly and a mass leader who had nothing to do with showbiz. I also recollected how silent October 2 is  every year. On Gandhi Jayanti, no loudspeakers or bursting of crackers are experienced. 
I wondered why were there no popular meetings of locals to discuss local issues relating to governance, rules and regulations, or even the constitution, education, equality, etc. What was happening had nothing to do with the person who was celebrated. 
Similarly, on Ram Navami (April 17, 2024), I could hear devotional songs, recitation of mantras and kirtans. Are these celebrations a reflection of the people who were celebrated or the people who celebrated them? It is time that we put more thought into our celebrations. Celebrations in India need not always be consisting of loud music and dancing on the roads, especially given the sheer number of days that we celebrate. We need to reimagine celebrations so that they reflect the values and the principles of the person or the day that is being celebrated and also not cause public nuisance. For example, on Rabindra Jayanti (May 8, 2024), there was no loud music in Pune but I know of a talk that was held. The talk was meant to inspire the audience into imbibing the approach of Tagore in their daily lives. Another example is how Lokmanya Gangadhar Tilak used Ganesh Utsav and Shivaji Jayanti to organize people politically. 
Gandhi Jayanti is not celebrated with much enthusiasm (compared to Ambedkar Jayanti) because Mahatma Gandhi was not associated with any caste or religion. By the way, celebration of the inauguration of the Ram temple at Ayodhya had nothing to do with patriotism or nationalism. However, I have witnessed that event being celebrated by playing the national anthem. 
Are we really free? Are we really independent? Who is controlling us? Is it so that the masses cannot relate to Gandhi and Tagore because they did not come from Maharashtra? Then why could the relate to Ram?
 It is because, people identify with Ambedkar for his caste and with Ram for his religion. However, both of them had taught to rise above both these identities. 
Indian citizens need to first know what it means to be a citizen. To be free comes from the freedom to think. Freedom to think comes from critical and creative thinking. We are blinded by our caste and religious identities and enough cannot be said by the propaganda of political parties which feeds into identity based politics. 
We must not let any religion or caste monopolize any colour. Orange need not be associated with Hindusim and Blue with the Dalits or green with the Muslims. Similarly, major leaders like Gokhale, Agarkar, Tilak, Dadabhai Naoroji, etc. also need to be celebrated but these celebrations need to be inspired by their lives and teachings. 
I do not appreciate the fact that caste and religion have tremendous unifying power in India. As long a this is the case, as long as we stay divided, we are not free citizen of a nation. These might be strong words but the mind is more important than anything. Wealth, heaven and love are actually states of mind. Everything begins with a thought, for example the conception of a separate country called 'Pakistan'. 
The words non-discrimination and secularism are the basis of unity. I do not understand how India has forgotten about her most ancient quality in which she and the world used to take pride in- 'unity in diversity'.  
It was the westerners who divided and ruled. We became slaves because they wanted to rule. They rule even now as they had planted the seeds of sectarianism long ago. They created to system and left but we are stuck in the system. The root of the word 'Nation' comes from 'natio' which means race. So, in modern times and in a modern democratic republic, we need not belong to the same race to be members of a nation, but the calling to live as a modern and strong nation and maintain it is a calling to actually forget about our race/caste/creed/religion. 
It is important to understand that to be a strong nation, we need not be jingoistic, divisive, uptight rigid. To be soft is a stronger quality. Only this quality gave us the resilience to continue inspite of umpteen number of invasions. At-least within the nation, softness, fraternity, unity, harmony and respect is needed and the lack of these should not be tolerated. This is where we need to demonstrate our strength. Jai Hind. 

The Secret to Real Confidence

 A lot of life and life energy gets wasted in resisting the present. However, only the present is true. This moment is never going to come again. When we are children, we want to become adults as soon as possible and when we are adults, we want to become young or youthful again. Grace is all about acceptance of the present and honouring your present life conditions. 

I have wasted a lot of my life resisting my father. Even though I highly respected him and did what he wanted me to do, I did it with a lot of resistance and hence suffered myself and built resentment. Eckhart Tolle says you must either accept the present, change it, or escape it. If you help someone without wanting to, better not. This does not mean we only have to do things we like. It means, that we need to temper down our likes and dislikes. We need to arrive at a place of more acceptance and less judgment or else do something about it. Living with resistance not only affects, our mindset, thoughts and feelings but it affects our relationships, health and life circumstances. 

Only when we accept something the way it is right now, can we live with it or change it gracefully. 

Also, this resistance to what is creates a fission within ourselves. It makes us inauthentic and deprives us of integrity. This is because, rather than taking our circumstances as a part of ourselves, we reject them and focus on what others have or what we want instead. We cannot feel both happy and sad at the same time. So we cannot focus both positively and negatively at the same time. So, if we want something that others have, we can focus on that thing positively and also focus positively on the similar thing that we have or the way(s) in which that thing manifests in our lives. This way, we are focussing positively and are hence attracting it into our lives. 

However, if we focus on our own life situation in a negative way, it is not possible to focus on the life that we want positively. We feel negative emotions to see the gap between what we have and what we want or where we are and where we want to be. Then, we feel emotions like grief, hurt, jealousy, shame, guilt, etc. These are forms of pain. Eckhart Tolle talks about what he calls as 'pain body'. This is the pain that we have been carrying around due to the wounds that we have not healed. This is why different people feel emotional pain because of different circumstances. These circumstances vary in both intensity and type. 

When there is pain, we can remind ourselves about what we need to do in the situation by remembering the following acronym:-

P-Pay 

A- Attention

I- Integrate 

N- Now. 

This way, we can completely change the meaning of pain and be thankful for it having come up so that we become aware of our pain body and heal more. As Sadguru Jaggi Vasudev has said, many yogis have actually prayed for difficult circumstances to spiritually grow faster. 

As we know, our experience of the world is not actually how the world is. This is because the way each one perceives and experiences the world is different. For example, you must have noticed that after a spiritual practice, the world seems better, and everything you see is fresher and clearer. Whereas, if you are grieving, the thoughts that come to your mind are all negative. So, whatever happens to us, is not happening to us as a fact. Actually, what is happening to us is the same as what we are open to receiving. This is why they say like attracts like. Also, what we are open to receiving depends on the level of our vibration. Thus, the world is not literally a mirror to us, but our perception of the world is and that is all that we could, can and would be able to know of the world. People say that travelling the world is necessary as we know of only one life. However, this is a horizontal way of doing things. One may not travel the world but the depth of one's experience can be as vast as his awareness. So, wouldn't it be nice to travel the world while also increasing our receptivity? 

What I am saying may not be easily understandable for everyone. To put it simply, do not cry over split milk, make hay while the sun shines, if don't get what you want, like what you get and if life gives you lemons, make lemonade!

All pain is because of resistance and fragmentation. Acceptance and integration go hand in hand. The moment we accept our life circumstances the way they are, we love the parts that are to our liking or we are motivated to move forward to change the parts that aren't. Both these ways take us towards meeting our own needs and becoming more fulfilled individuals. This also raises one's confidence as we develop self-acceptance, peace and drive for action. In the process, especially while making decisions, we further integrate our parts by bringing all conflicting parts of ourselves on the same page and evaluating the priority of our various values. This way, we get to know ourselves and are more self-assured. 

You are The Purpose

Often it is said that a human needs a purpose in life.  However, what should those who are still figuring out their purpose do? What would motivate them to live a good quality life? 

Some say, the answer is self love.  Okay, but loving yourself is a weird and counterintuitive concept for many.  How can one love oneself, love is an emotion and also a verb. Love, in essence means to take another as a part of yourself. How can you take yourself as a part of yourself? This is why, the concept of self love is a bit difficult to comprehend. 

There is one way to explain it. There are two ways to go about it. 

First way: 

You are fragmented and hence you have many parts inside yourself which have different needs and thus pull you in various directions. Some are stronger than others. However, if you deeply accept and embrace all the parts within yourself and each of your parts relates to another in a harmonious way, the needs of all of them become important and you fulfill them in the best way possible such that it is advantageous to all your parts or the whole of you.  In this way, you practice self love and truly honour the value of integrity. 

Second way: 

This way is more external than internal. You don't need a purpose, you just need to know your value. This very moment of your existence has an impact on the world. Even your thoughts have an impact on the world. Thoughts emit a vibration  just like sound waves. The world was first created by a sound (Aum). God said, "let there be light". In Hindi it is said, "Sankalp se srishti". 

Also, at this moment you exist to expand the universe. You are a culmination of a long line of humans and you might lead to further expansion. The way you evolve has an impact on the future generations. 

I had read somewhere that the children of older and more educated women are more intelligent because of the higher education of the mother.

Also, although we cannot see properly from our current limited perspectives, we all are more interconnected and interdependent than we. Who knows, if you help a person today and he greatly benefits from it and after 60 years you see his grand daughter marrying your grandson. So, limiting love towards your own family or community is absolutely meaningless. Being all inclusive is the only rational way to be.  

So, irrespective of whether we value our lives or not, or we have a purpose or not, our lives don't stop being significant. Investing in yourself now, means that you are preparing yourself for when the opportunity arises and for when you are able and available to do what is needed to be done. 

Out of honour, pride and  gratitude to our ancestors and hope, responsibility and blessings to our future lineage, the natural outcome is to improve the quality of your body, mind, intelligence and develop yourself spiritually. 

As David Goggins says, "You are the purpose". 

Unlearning What Brings You Down

Once upon a time, I was quite triggered by a guy I liked who wouldn't reply to all of my messages. He would reply in single words or reply quickly when we were planning to meet.  In person, he had been quite sweet and caring but his not replying to all my texts made me feel quite hurt, angry and confused. He didn't have a plausible explanation nor did he apologize. So I lost interest but it got me thinking about why was his behavior on texts affecting me so much.  I had already come a long way since my childhood in recognizing my self-worth and what I deserve, and I have had very therapeutic experiences in which I was accepted completely for who I was.  So yes, despite all the inner work and correctional experiences, why was I being at the mercy of a boy? 

I was nudged into this direction by a podcast episode by Hailey Hoffman Smith titled 'How to work with your triggers and move to your highest timeline'. So, as she recommended, I felt the pain and discomfort completely and reminded myself that this trigger was actually calling my attention to a wound that I'd been carrying for a long time. I was happy and thankful for this pain and hurt to have come up because now, I can consciously give it attention. So, I did that during my meditation session but still couldn't understand why I was so hurt. However, sleep is an amazing thing.  👏  Just after a nap, it dawned upon me that we as children are quite sensitive and soak in everything.

The root of this pain came from me seeing myself in the role of Kajol in Kuch Kuch Hota Hai. As a child I did that because I used to dress like her then but boy oh boy, it was an extremely unhealthy stereotype that I had internalized. First of all, I made looks very important in my mind but at the same time knew that you can not look very fashionable or glamorous but still be a good person. However, if a guy doesn't like you, it is mostly due to your looks. But this messaging was not quite strong. What was of primary importance and the root cause of my pain was seeing Kajol being devastated and shattered to know that the person she loved so dearly was in love with someone else.  This shows non-acceptance of the reality of people's wishes and extremely low self-worth that makes you feel bad about yourself just because a guy does not like you the way you like him. She did not see herself to be worthy enough to think that she had better things to do in life than whine over someone who didn't love her romantically. She did not have an Eckhart appreciation for life and the enormous possibilities that this amazing, juicy, resourceful and responsive world provides! She did not value her own life which is surely magnificent and amazing but temporary. The problem is that we create hopes and expectations of the future as we dream about it and we reject the present. In the 'Power of Now' by Eckhart Tolle, he has put it quite sensibly.  He states that to be in the now or to be free, you need to forgive not just people, including yourself but also the past, present and future; and that there is no difference between forgiveness and acceptance. Both of them mean that there is no resistance to your experience of reality. This way, every moment is seen with new eyes. 

It is relevant here to understand that we keep making so many decisions and live our lives, without really questioning if the value-judgements that we live by are ours or are inherited from our ancestors or our society. Basically, it is called conditioning or socialization. We would accept that we are quite delusional if we actually realize the multitude of ways in which society has messed up our minds.  The 'civilizations' all around the have socialized us in every aspect of our lifestyle so much so that it has literally imprisoned us. I am using a very strong word here but if we actually trace back our thoughts or contemplate why we do the things that we do, we would notice that civilization has made life unnecessarily complex and the norms, expectations and values that we have internalized are often not healthful for us. Many of them are not nurturing or nourishing in any way whatsoever. The entire fashion industry is built around shame. Feeling less worthy and judging others goes hand in hand and it is not one person's fault. It is just the effect of growing up in a society that has a long but sure way to go spiritually.  

Last but not least, that realisation that I had internalized the need to pity myself, get hurt and feel disappointed because a guy didn't treat me the way I expected, was an aha moment! I am forever cured of this problem and it is in fact quite laughable to even think all this from a soul level.  That's because the present can't change, I don't want anyone who doesn't want me anyway and I know for a fact through experience that when I'm feeling bad, I am feeling that way because I am not aware of the truth. When you're aligned with the truth, you can't be sad.

So, now if anyone ignores you, to bother is none of your business. Live and let live but first, live! The best thing to do is to be grateful to have had the experience and thank the person for it.

The Value and Need for Human Rights

My favourite subjects have been Value Education and Philosophy. While studying Political Science, I got the opportunity to study Political Philosophy. I was quite impressed and inspired by the value given by the constitutions of all the nations to individual and community rights. Coming together with people is essential for securing the rights of a group. Only because of the Constitution in particular and the laws, in general, do we have stability and a foundation for a secure society where there is always hope, even if the situation hits rock bottom. 

I want to see a society where there is equity and people are happy and they enjoy good health. Human resource is a magnificent resource and the return on investment is too valuable to quantify. Hence, I have always been concerned about what can be done to provide people with a good life. 

People who belong to marginalised groups face many difficulties only because of their social situation. For example, people who have been displaced by large projects like the Sardar Sarovar project. Among these, those who are women, dalits, adivasis, gender and sexual minorities and persons with disabilities, have to undergo double the trouble.

These communities face structural violence that is propagated by our tradition, social miscreants and the lack of empathy for them in general.

These groups of people share two things in common:-

1. The world is not made for them just like scissors are not made for lefties.

2. They are perceived to have lesser worth and thus less able.

Thus, they do not have equal access to opportunities from the get-go and are thus at an unfair disadvantage because of the social location of their birth. 

I am of the firm opinion that if people feel included, through a sense of belongingness and ownership in the polity, they will all be happier, healthier and, more productive and self-actualized. 

Why Are the Most Rational Ways to Do Things Called the 'Alternative'?

https://indianexpress.com/article/opinion/columns/dear-narayana-murthy-heres-why-you-need-to-read-karl-marx-thoreau-and-john-ruskin-9009732/ 

This is such a beautiful read. it is a respite since the world has been becoming predominantly masculine. Living life fully in the present is an art that needs to be relearnt. There is great scope for making improvements in the work culture in many organizations. As Avjit Pathak sir said, there are some mad people, so there is hope. One pertinent question that comes to mind is, why does the norm always have to include practices that are short sighted, unsustainable and unhealthful? Why were enlightened people like Ramakrishna Paramhansa were labelled as mad by the society? Why non-intrusive and healfthful treatments labelled 'alternative' therapies or why renewable sources of energy have to be called 'alternative' sources of energy? It is understandable that man was not always wise, buy how long will he take to rationalise his activities? Now that, wisdom has dawned upon him, how long will the sustainable and healthful practices become the norm so that the feminine and masculine balance each other out. We always knew that ecology is indirectly economy, what is within is without and personal is political. 

On Achieving Goals

Often in life, we try to improve our life circumstances by making efforts and doing things which we think will change our life situation for the better. We try to improve our lives through self-help content from books/videos/podcasts, etc. Of course, all of this is very helpful but the advice is quite general. 

To achieve the results that 'We' want, we need to know a few things:-

1. Who are we?

2. What do we want?

3. Why do we not have what we want?

Who am I? Once we have the answer to this question, not intellectually but the true knowing through experience and self-introspection, we find stillness, calmness and peace within us that is indestructible and eternal. 

Then, the positive affirmations would not seem like new thoughts but rather mirrors reflecting what you really are. This is not a positive mindset or an attitude but a divine place within you which is eternally available for you to visit. It is you, but beneath everything that is not you. Once, this is in place, you are in the right place. So, we need to keep checking if we are in the right place or else, we are lost to unconsciousness. 

The second question, that is, 'what do we want?' can be answered by us alone. The answer is correct when we are answering it from the above-said 'right place'. It is very important to keep in mind that the above-said place is primary and our goals are secondary. Goals should be decided from the 'right place' but the 'right place' should never be decided based on the goals, that would lead us to sell our souls and there is no inheritance more precious and sacred than this 'right place'.  So, never compromise, as you have to live with yourself and you can't make yourself a destitute. 

The answer to the third question can be gathered from the abovesaid self-help content. However, in my opinion, the best way to find the answer is to observe what people who have the same results do and replicate them. Also, the better way to do it is to be observed and corrected by those who know exactly what you want, want you to have it and have it themselves. Often, we get irritated or angry due to the repeated criticism coming at us from people who have observed us from close quarters. If we really appreciate what they say and take the critical statements constructively in case they are going to take us to our desired goals, I do not see any harm. 

Lastly, if you really want to achieve your goals, keep checking if you know your exact goals, narrow them down so that they aren't overwhelming, keep them precise so that your focus is accurate, know the pattern in your mistakes, keep checking if you are in the right place and hit only when you are sure. So, keep making sure that a victory is predictable but if you fail, never give up.  

Independence

Independence or living life on your own terms does not come from financial Independence, living alone, or even knowledge. It comes from self-awareness. Our choices can be exercised when we are aware of our own values. Absent-minded indulgence or selfless sacrifices are two extreme scenarios of what happens when we do not exercise our judgement and discrimination while making choices or taking decisions without self-awareness. Both of these go against our well-being. 

No wonder, Gandhi described Swarajya as 'Enlightened self-rule'. 

Nothing is particularly right or good for anyone. What determines whether something is right is whether the process (means) and the consequences (end) align with our values. 

That is why Gandhi said that the means are as important as the end. 

Spirit

We all feel a sense of lack on some level. This lack is expressed as needs.  These are physical,  emotional,  sexual etc. 

The nature of a human life is such that there will be needs for all practical purposes.  The non-fulfillment of these needs creates  negative feelings i.e. pain.   This does not allow us to live in a magnificent way, in-spite of us being magnificent beings. As Abraham Hicks say, we are source energy in physical bodies. 

The blocks in expressing our magnificence come about because we are holding on to our pain. Fear is just pain manifest and all negative emotions come from fear. 

If we could find a way to let go of our pain which is living inside us in the form of fear/rage/anger/jealousy/grief/disappointment/any other negative emotion(s), we could then experience our magnificent inert nature. 

The moment, we experience this nature we have the self confidence to take life in our stride. We realise that nothing matters very much and that no pain or hurt is stronger than ourselves. It makes us more capable to face all facets of life. 

This is not an understanding, it is an experience.  It is the experience of your own nature that is not masked. This knowing is very empowering in several ways. This empowered person is free to pursue all needs without being attached to their objects of desire as they know that they are whole and complete and devoid of any needs (in actuality). They understand that the needs exist for all practical purposes of the human life and are temporary.  All desires are meant to be enjoyed without attachment. They recognize that the world has a lot to offer for their survival and enjoyment but they are not incomplete in anyway. 

They have pain because they are not able to realise their own wholeness. Even Plato in his theory of Forms explained that nothing that exists in the practical world is a perfect copy of that which exists in the true and absolute world. This helps us accept that nothing is going to be perfect and done and that everything in the physical/ practical world is not complete and we should give ourselves the respite by accepting that it's never going to look the way it really is. As Abraham Hicks say,  you can't get it wrong because you never get it done.  

So rather that focusing on the ways in which things are not the way they should be,  we can relish in the ways in which they are as we like. 

This is not bypassing the reality but accepting the reality that the practical world is imperfect. Such an understanding safeguards ourselves from imbalance. Basically, our Being can stay as unaffected (and more stable, secure and balanced) much as possible.  

Moreover, we always have access to the absolute world when we go inwards. 

You are magnificent, whole and complete and the practical world has no capability to provide for your needs in an absolute and perfect way.  You have in you every feeling you need,  absolutely because where you come from is perfect just like you.  

Pain just exists so that you can sense/ realise the shadow nature of the physical world. 

When I Am Not Happy, I Do Not Know the Truth

 Yogas Chitta Vritti Nirodha is a phrase that I am very drawn to, lately. It means yoga is the stilling of the fluctuations of the mind. 

We, keep on seeking something, something to relieve our suffering and something to give us pleasure. However, in this constant endeavour, we miss out on the essence of ourselves. Our essence itself is joy, love, peace, and fulfilment. Hence, we are never satisfied- can not be satisfied because no experience can match up to this experience of our core or essence on a consistent basis. 

Hum Rahe Ya Na Rahe Kal

Kal Yaad Aayenge Yeh Pal

Pal Yeh Hain Pyaar Ke Pal

Chal Aa Mere Sang Chal

Chal Soche Kya

Chhoti Si Hai Zindagi

Kal Mil Jaaye To

Hogi Khushnaseebi ~

These lyrics strings a chord in my heart but then at the same time, it is great teaching. Moments come and go, nothing lasts. However, something that is always available to me is my own self. It is like a flower that is always in bloom. It is beautiful, colorful, and fragrant. That is the quality of myself, that I carry around. 

One more concept that I have understood and believe to be true is that when I am not happy, I do not know the truth. When I feel a negative emotion, I am far away from experiencing my own self and perceiving the truth. 

They say truth can be bitter. But, I don't believe that. One cannot know the truth with limited awareness. In fact, one cannot know everything, always. We are limited by time and space. 

But in reality, as per the post-Einstein understanding, all moments exist at once. There is past, present, and future, in fact, we are moving through them, but they exist together at the same time. Our subconscious and unconscious minds move through them in ways and speeds that we do not understand logically or consciously. The whole world is working on a conscious level, which is limited to rationality. Many times, we work even without rationality. However, rationality is also limited. 

States of pleasure dramatically alter our state of mind, however coming out of it, may bring sense of wastefulness. This is because, what we could experience independent of the material world, we have experienced being dependent on it. However, pleasure may allow us to think or feel on a much higher level than what  our rationality or the regular states of mind may allow. 

So, consciousness, rationality, and the way we feel are all connected and go together. 

When we go higher in one of them, we go higher in others as well. However, rationality is different from science. Science is limited but actual experiments. However, rationality can deduce without having to do physical experiments. 

The forms of yoga- are karma (action), bhakti (devotion), raja (discipline ), and jnana (knowledge). All these paths have a different share of rationality and emotion. 

Sat - chit- ananda = existence- consciousness- bliss

This phrase on its own explains why one cannot have a negative emotion when one is aware of the truth. The state of awareness is directly proportional to the way we feel. 

So, no path is better or worse, all meet at the same end and meet one another, eventually. Hence, everything turns out good in the end. This is not because it turns out good in the end (as per our current understanding of good). Rather it is that we ultimately reach complete awareness in the end. Bodhisattvas or sages come back again and again to uplift humanity because of their compassion. We are one family and those who have reached are waiting for us with patience and compassion. They want us to experience the bliss that they do constantly. It is said that Shiva was the first yogi who came to do this. 

Vibration precedes manifestation. It means that nothing comes into existence before it vibrates. It has been proved by science that matter is a wave as well as a particle. According to Sadguru Jaggi Vasudev,  even the bubble chamber experiment proves that subatomic particles appear and disappear multiple times in a very short period of time. It proves what Buddha said as per Sadguru. He said that he realized that between the time of opening and closing of his eyes (a blink of an eye), he appeared and disappeared a million times. 

All this I have not experienced. However, I know one thing for sure. There is a lot to feel, understand, know, and experience. I also know that heaven or hell is basically our state of mind. It is not called a state of mind for nothing. I believe that awareness and emotion are intimately linked and cannot state be delinked. A rising of one raises another. 💛

Lean In, Dear Women

'Lean In; Women, Work, and the will to lead.' is an internationally bestselling book by Sheryl Sandberg  (Chief Operating Officer of Facebook). I thank my teacher, friend, and mentor Jyoti Pradeep ma'am for lending it to me. 😇

The book hits the nail on the head regarding the lower status of women and their disempowerment. I am proud that being a successful leader herself, she has used her position for the empowerment of women throughout her life as well as through the book. The book is thoroughly researched, excellently written, easy to read and I am sure will touch every reader's heart.

In my opinion, every human must read this book and it is as imperative as it is to know the Law. I say this because, it is essential for everyone to become aware of the facts of the current so-called 'modern' society, polity, and economy. Only an aware individual would function in life always considering the 'woman question and be gender-sensitive. 

I was compelled to note down some quotes from the book. All of these are from the last chapter titled-'Working Together Toward Equality'. 

Following are some of my favorite quotes from the book.:-

1. "Equal opportunity is not equal unless everyone receives the encouragement that makes seizing those opportunities possible. Only then can both men and women achieve their full potential ".

2. "Women who want to take two weeks off ... or two days off... or two years ...or twenty years deserve everyone's full support".

3. " Because the vast majority of leaders are men, it is not possible to generalize from any one example. But the dearth of female leaders causes one woman to be viewed as representative of her entire generation ".

4. "In the 1970s, this phenomenon was common enough that the term "queen bee" was used to describe a woman who flourished in a leadership role, especially in male-dominated industries, and who used her position to keep other female "worker bees" down. For some, it was simple self-preservation. For others, it reflected their coming of age in a society that believed men were superior to women ". 

5. " Women's negative views of female coworkers are often seen as an objective assessment- more credible than the views of men"

6. " Society has long undervalued the contributions of those who work without salary ".

7. "Mothers who work outside the home should regard mothers who work inside the home as real workers. And mothers who work inside the home should be equally respectful of those choosing another option ".

8. "Expectations will not be set by gender but by personal passion, talents and interests ". 

9. "...These policies can have severe consequences; families with no access to paid family leave often go into debt and call fall into poverty. Part-time jobs with fluctuating schedules offer little chance to plan and often stop short of the forty-hour week that provides basic benefits ". 

10. " We must raise both the ceiling and the floor ". 

11. " More female leadership will lead to fairer treatment for all women. Shared experience forms the basis of empathy and, in turn, can spark the institutional changes we need ". 

12. " If we push hard now, this next wave can be the last wave. In the future, there will be no female leaders. There will just be leaders ".  

13. 'When Gloria Steinem marched in the streets to fight for the opportunities that so many of us now take for granted, she quoted Susan B. Anthony, who marched in the streets before her and concluded, " Our job is not to make young women grateful. It is to make them ungrateful so they keep going ".'   

 

14. " I believe women can lead more in the workplace. I believe men can contribute more in the home. And I believe that this will create a better world, where half our institutions are run by women and half our homes are run by men ".